Monday, May 19, 2008

Everyone Needs a Wife

An author was being interviewed on a radio talk show the other day. For a brief segment, she was talking about how she works from home part time while her husband works as a doctor. She expressed how this arrangement has been beneficial to keeping her home and family running smoothly. Here is the quote from my memory:

"Everyone needs a wife. I mean that 1950s kind of wife that bakes and cleans and takes care of all of that stuff."

Before I get to my point, the context was clear that she was not making a sexist comment (especially since she is a woman). She was using the term "wife" as a euphemism for "person who keeps your life running", and she was including women in "everyone".

Lately I've been thinking about how true that is in my life. My wife stays home with the kids while I work. This works for us and honestly, I have a hard time understanding how couples make it work otherwise. There are so many responsibilities that families have outside of work. How do dual-income families find time for these things? I'm talking about home maintenance, financial planning, shopping, taking care of kids (of course very important), doing research on decisions that need to be made, and a million other important things I can't possibly list. I realize that some of these things you can hire people to do for you, but there are plenty that you cannot, such as caring for a sick child. Our son has medical issues that have caused what seems like daily doctor's appointments. I think if we both worked, one of us would have had to have quit by now. But even without medical issues, it's hard for me to imagine that it could work.

So, for those of you who are in dual-income families, I ask you: How do you do it? How do you keep your life running? For those of you in single-income families but who are married, I ask: Can you imagine your family running otherwise? For those of you who are single parents, I can only imagine how hard your struggle is, as you have the worst of both worlds: a single income and no one to share the burden. My heart goes out to you.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Mike great site. Fun post. Reminds me of an argument DH and I had while we were at BYU a 100 years ago. DH keeps asking me to do stuff for him. Finally I get mad. I tell him to do it himself because I have school and work too. He responds with that is what a wife is for ( imagine what you want, my response was not pretty). One of the points I made was that I need a "wife" too.
Fast forward 100 years and I am his "wife". Me, I have a housekeeper.

Garrett said...

Neil Young's song, "A Man Needs a Maid" is one of my favorites. I don't think it's sexist (although I could be wrong). I think he's saying that we all need someone to do the housework so that we have time to really live and have meaningful relationships.

Anyway, my mom was a single parent for many years. She was a long-haul trucker and she took me with her everywhere. I remember talking to her about Mormons and she told me that she would often avoid the state of Utah in her travels because she was looked down upon as a woman and mother. She wasn't doing it right, she was supposed to be at home with her child while 'dad' worked. Little do they know that I spent more time with my mom (before I started school) than any other child I know of (including my own who are at home with my wife). I have since joined the LDS church, but I think there are lots of questions on this topic.

Thanks for the though provoking posts.

Anonymous said...

Hi !.
You may , probably very interested to know how one can make real money .
There is no initial capital needed You may commense to get income with as small sum of money as 20-100 dollars.

AimTrust is what you haven`t ever dreamt of such a chance to become rich
AimTrust represents an offshore structure with advanced asset management technologies in production and delivery of pipes for oil and gas.

It is based in Panama with affiliates around the world.
Do you want to become really rich in short time?
That`s your chance That`s what you really need!

I`m happy and lucky, I started to get income with the help of this company,
and I invite you to do the same. If it gets down to choose a correct partner who uses your savings in a right way - that`s it!.
I take now up to 2G every day, and my first investment was 500 dollars only!
It`s easy to get involved , just click this link http://mypoququsa.jamminweb.com/gujiqehy.html
and go! Let`s take our chance together to get rid of nastiness of the life

Anonymous said...

Good day, sun shines!
There have been times of hardship when I felt unhappy missing knowledge about opportunities of getting high yields on investments. I was a dump and downright stupid person.
I have never thought that there weren't any need in large initial investment.
Nowadays, I'm happy and lucky , I started to get real money.
It gets down to select a correct companion who uses your money in a right way - that is incorporate it in real deals, parts and divides the profit with me.

You can get interested, if there are such firms? I have to tell the truth, YES, there are. Please be informed of one of them:
http://theinvestblog.com [url=http://theinvestblog.com]Online Investment Blog[/url]

Anonymous said...

Glad to materialize here. Good day or night everybody!

We are not acquainted yet? It’s easy to fix,
my parents call me Nikolas.
Generally I’m a venturesome analyst. all my life I’m carried away by online-casino and poker.
Not long time ago I started my own blog, where I describe my virtual adventures.
Probably, it will be interesting for you to find out my particular opinion on famous gambling projects.
Please visit my diary. http://allbestcasino.com I’ll be glad would you find time to leave your opinion.

Anonymous said...

I love thehorebite.blogspot.com! Here I always find a lot of helpful information for myself. Thanks you for your work.
Webmaster of http://loveepicentre.com and http://movieszone.eu
Best regards